March 06, 2011

The Purchase Officer

I had mentioned in my earlier blog about my very close friend and my roommate during my bachelor days - Surendra a.k.a Suri Sr. When the two of us are together we were always game for playing pranks with people. There are many pranks that we guys have played with a few colleagues. This saturday while I was lazily browsing through the news paper, an advertisement for a job offer came to my notice. What attracted my attention was the position... the Ad was for an opening for the post of Purchase Officer. Just those two words brought a smile to my face and it took my down th ememory lane way back to my bachelor days... the year: 1993, the place: Mysore, the location: the L&T factory and my humble dwelling at Ramakrishna nagar, Mysore.

One day, as we got off the office bus and were entering the gate, we (Surendra and myself) heard someone talking about a job opening at "Sulabh International" in Bangalore. We knew someone was playing a prank. Hailing from Bangalore, the two of us knew what Sulabh International was all about. Sulabh International is a Social Service organisation and at that time were into cleaning and maintaining the public toilets in Bangalore. Being the pranksters that we were, as soon as we walked into our department, we announced that there was good job opening in Bangalore and they are looking for young graduates with or without any experience and that it is a good company and they pay handsomely. As usual, the questions about the source of the news came up and we conveniently said that it was there in the news paper. Folks who were residents of Mysore did not show much interest. (That was one thing that I noticed, localites - I mean people settled in Mysore did not want to leave their native and go out other cities in search of jobs. They were happy to be living in Mysore and make their living with whatever job they can get - a very contended lot. Things have changed now though). Some of the other folks showed some interest and began asking for more details. We gave the company details, job post etc - Purchase Officer at Sulabh International Bangalore. One of the guys (I am not naming him here as there is a possibility that he would get to read this and do not want to embarass him) asked for the address. Suri Sr conveniently looked at me and said "Dey Suri, whats the address da, you remember?" Without batting an eyelid I said "Yes
ofcourse" even as I was thinking of some address to tell this guy. I still remember the address that we gave him :) I just started with - "No. 17, Golden Enclave...." (Golden Enclave was the only thing that came to my mind as that was one of the biggest office complex near my house at that time), I was still thinking what to say next, when Suri Sr. continued -"First cross, Vittal Mallya Road..." and then I completed it for him "...Pulikeshi nagar, Bangalore - 560 001". We both looked at each other and smiled. But within ourselves we were laughing our guts out while our "prey" was writing down the address in all sincerity and said "naanu eevathe apply maadtheeni" (I will apply for it today itself).

Back at home in the evening, Suri Sr and myself were laughing uncontollably at what had happened on the office... more than the company name, their profile or the job position, we were amused with our spontaneity with the address. We were laughing uncontrollably because each line of the address was in different corners of Bangalore. Goldern Enclave was near the Airport, Vittal Malya Road was near the Kanteerava stadium which is at least 5-6 kilometers from Golden enclave, Pulikeshi nagar is near Cox town which is totally on the opposite side and Bangalore-1 is near the railway station. Our eyes were filled with tears laughing so much and at the thought of the post - "Purchase officer". Slowly things settled down, we were getting ready for dinner. We were 5 guys in a small 2 BHK and another 5 guys on the first floor of the same building. On most of the days all the ten of us have dinner together. They bring everything that they cooked to our house and we form a big circle on the floor and share our dinner. It was always fun and I still miss those days. One of the guys living upstairs finished his dinner very fast and said he needs to make a call to his brother and left. (Those days, we did not have the luxury of cell phones back then. In fact, even pages were not very common at that time. Pagers??? whats that? some of you must be wondering. Well... simply put, we can say it is some kind of a one sided communication device where you can receive "text message" but cannot respond from the device). Again, I am not naming the person who left to make the call. We had to walk about 5-10 mins from our house to reach one of the STD booths at Vivekananda nagar circle to make a call. While we had just finished dinner and still sitting around all the empty vesslels and plates, craking jokes etc, our man had finished his call and walks in with a funny expression - angry, yet smiling and said "Nanna makkala (colloquial usage like "saale" in hindi), Sulabh Internationalli Purchase officer post-ige opening idheya?" (You guys, so Sulabh International has openings for Purchase officer ha?). Suri Sr and myself looked at each other and again started laughing but were wondering why this guy is reacting so late in the day. Then we understood why... He was also a victim of our prank (but we were not aware of it until then). He had called his brother and enquired about the company. His brother was working in Bangalore and so he had called to know if it was worth a try in this company. That is when he got to know about the whole thing. We all had a hearty laugh and went to bed after washing the utensils. That episode ended there.

A week later...
Suri Sr and myself were in the second shift. During second shift we take a tea break at around 9.00pm. We guys sit around for about 10 minutes having fun and discussing all the topics under the sun. Suddenly, the person to whom we had given the "address" blurted out looking at the two of us - "Suri, yen replyne baralilla ri" (Suri, I didn't get any reply). We were wondering what he was referring to, as he mentioned this out of the blue. We looked at him and asked what reply he was talking about. He said that he had applied for the Purchase officer position. Suri and myself looked at each other without knowing how to react. We had forgotten about the whole thing the same day we announced it. But here was a guy who had applied for the job in all sincerity. How would he react when we reveal it was just a prank and no such address existed. I felt sorry for him and was cursing myself that it had gone this far. I recovered from my thought process and asked him, if he was sure that he wrote the correct address to which he said that he wrote the exact address he had noted down and that he had even pasted his photograph on the CV. Then I blurted out - "If you have stuck your photograph on the CV, never ever show your face in Bangalore. That post man might still be hunting for you". He was looking at us totally confused. Then we confessed that it was just a prank and never expected that someone really apply for the job. Initially he was angry and embarassed but soon joined us in the laughter. When the laughter subsided he declared - "Innamele ibbaru Surigalannu naanu nombodhe illa" (From now onwards, I won't trust both these Suris - Both Surendra and myself were known by the name Suri among the friends circle). It is a different matter that 3 days after his "declaration" we convinced him that the Indian Government is coming out with a Three Rupee coin :).

WYHINWIS

No No No... there is no typo in the title of my blog and it does not need a spell check. Are you wondering what it means? I mean "WYHINWIS"...

Well, most people, especially in the IT field would be familiar with WYSIWYG (What You See Is What You Get). I have had many funny incidents related to communication, couple of which I have mentioned in my earlier blogs. That is what prompted me to think about this acronym similar to WYSIWYG for things related communicatoin - WYHINWIS i.e. What You Heard Is Not What Is Said.

Many a times, it so happens that we hear something that is totally different from what was actually said and I guess it happens with most of us in everyday life. But there are some that are very funny and hilarious that it gets etched in our memory. We dont forget it and also it brings a smile every time we think about it. One such incident happened in recent times. It was just a couple of months since I moved to Pune and I was not familar with Marathi, the local language (not that I am familiar with it now :P). But I have managed with my itsy bitsy hindi so far. (My better half always teases me about my "proficiency" in Hindi). This incident that I am about to describe happened in a medical shop like the "IPL ticket" episode. From the time I have moved to Pune, I have spent more time in medical shops and clinics apart from office, since my younger daughter has been falling sick very often from the time we moved in here. After one such visit to the paediatrician at Viman nagar, I went to the medical shop - "Religare" which is on the ground floor of the same building. As you enter the store, there is high probability of you spotting a highly "decked up" sales girl who spends more time in front of her hand held mirror and make up kit rather than with the customers. In my case except once, everytime I have entered the store, I have seen her with the mirror in one hand and a lipstick or a hair brush in the other. I am one of those people who does not go ga-ga over a beautiful woman and nor am I really interested in physical beauty. To me, beautiful person is someone who is beautiful at heart and mind. Trust me... I just hate the sight of the plastic coated FULLY artifical smile planted face of a certain Ms. Aishwarya Rai Bachchan. i.e. I dont find her fitting into my definition of a beautiful woman. I generally do not pass comments on someone's looks but this girl at Religare... I can't stop myself from making this comment. She definitely belongs to the "Good from far, Far from good" category. I guess I am deviating too much from what I wanted to say. So let me take a break from this sales girl and move on to the other one at the counter.

I gave the prescription the other sales girl at the counter. As she was browsing through the prescription I gave her, she looked at the other gentleman standing next to me and said "Dharu piya". I was shocked at what I just heard. I was not sure if it was a question or a statement. I know that "Dharu" means liqour and "piya" is to drink. She said it without any change in her expression. I thought she probably knew this person, but was not sure if she asked him whether he was drunk or if she just joked that she was drunk. What amazed me was that this gentleman also did not have any change in his expression and without uttering a word he paid her, collected his medicines and walked away. I was still wondering what was going on... It took me a while to understand that she just informed her the cost of his medicine, he paid and left. What she said was NOT "Dharu piya". She just said "Dha Rupaya".
"Dha" = Ten (in Marathi) and "Rupaya" = Rupees. All she said was "Ten Rupees" in Marathi. And I was unecessarily trying to understand what communication was going on between the two. Thats why I said WYHINWIS.