Many a times I have wondered... in spite of English being a common language of communication why do we have so much of confusion at times. There are many instances where one says something and totally a different thing is understood by the listener. One such hilarious incident happened to me.......
... way back in the early 90s while I was a bachelor when I worked with L&T at Mysore. We were 5 guys living in a small 2 BHK. We had shifts at office and so we had a tiny "notice board" in our living room, which will normally have messages for the people in the other shift. The guys in the second shift reach home close to midnight and by that time the first shift guys would hit the bed as they have to catch the company bus at around 7.20am. Similarly, when they leave for work, the second shift guys would still be fast asleep. In those days, we did not have the luxury of cell phone, pagers or even a land line. (Today life comes to a stand still without a cell phone. Even a student cant imagine a life without cell phone. It is an era where, Students may forget to carry their books to school/college but not their cell phone). We had a overlap of close to 45 minutes between people in the 2 shifts. So we normally communicate during that time if some information needs to be passed to each other. But if it is something urgent then the "notice board" comes to picture. Our so-called notice board was a thick rectangular piece of a sponge like packing material stuck to the wall on which we used to pin up the "communication" apart from letters from our families. ("Letters"... now they are called "Snail mails" - now, can a youngster imagine writing letters to their family?... I doubt if they have ever seen an inland letter).
Though we were bachelors, we used to cook our own food for various reasons...
1. It is any time healthier. 2. It worked out cheaper 3. We did not have the luxury of eating out everyday as we lived on a shoe string budget... and most importantly 4. We were great cooks in our own rights :P
One night myself and one of my roomates (Surendra a.k.a Suri Sr... Suri Sr. because I was also called Suri... so we became Suri Sr. and Suri Jr.) returned home from a night shift to see a "notice" waiting for us. The note was was written by Shri (Shrinath) and it read - "Our gasket is broken, buy a new one tomorrow morning". The guys in second shift normally get up very late around noon, cook food, have our "brunch" and then leave for office. Now this was an "emergency" notice because, if we follow the regular routine we will not be able to use the cooker as the gasket is broken. And for us to get a gasket we had to go to the "city" as they would not be available in the nearby "provison stores". Suri and myself looked at eachother and smiled... the smile meant -"So we have a job to do for tomorrow". (I must admit.. for some reason Suri Sr and myself understood each other very well to an extent that we could read the others mind perfectly... we could communicate without speaking a word). Suri hit the bed, while I followed my regular routine... switched on the TV (a black and white portable) which had our innovative "stolen" cable connection... stolen because we did not have a regular cable connection. We had a wire connected to internal antenna of the TV and the other end connected to a aluminium hanger that formed a "loop antenna" and the hanger would be placed out side through window. I try to tune in anything good that is watchable mostly some Sports channel or Discovery. I would watch TV until the screen starts to appear "blurred". I guess I switch off the TV involuntarily because, when I wake up in the morning (read afternoon) it is switched off and no one has ever complained that I go off to sleep without switching off the TV.
I could faintly hear "noises" around me... someone boiling the milk, Shri shouting - "Chandru keep water for me" (we used immersion coil to heat the water and with one bathroom it was always hectic in the morning ... each one trying to grab the "bathroom space"). I was only hearing these faintly and I knew it was close to 7.00am. Then I heard Singa's voice (Singarajan) - "Bye, bye, bye bye"... Singa was a very meticulous guy and worked on a time table. His time never interuppted anybody else's routine as he was always up early and by the time anyone of us are up, he would have finished even dressing up. Before he leaves home he makes it a point to say "bye" to each one of us without even waiting for a response.. though he would meet some of us at the bus stop in the next 5 mins or so. After sometime I hear the door slamming and then few hurried noisy foot steps on the stair case. I knew the guys were late.. we are late almost every day. I guess only SInga used to walk to the bus stop while the rest if us never had the luxury to do that and always had to jog. Finally, all the noises around me subsided and I had a peaceful sleep once again.... I guess it shd be around 7.15am.
Within "minutes" another noise distrubed my sleep. This time it was a noise from the kitchen. I thought a cat had entered our kitchen to drink the milk. I ran to the kitchen to see Surendra standing there trying to heat the milk. I was wondering why is this guy up so soon. As I entered the kitchen he smiled and it reminded me -"we have a job to do... the gasket". Now I knew why Suri was up "so early". I smiled back and asked - "So can we leave in sometime" and he said "yes we should, as we are late already". I said we have a lot of time and he smiled. This time around I could not make out the meaning of the smile, but I knew he had a message in it. I washed my face and started brushing when he said - "Hurry up, we need to have lunch before we reach the bus stop". I wondered what was wrong with him. I finished with my brushing and glanced at Singa's "time piece" (alarm clock) and now understood the meaning of Suri's smile moments ago. It was close to 1.00PM. I was shocked because... just "minutes" ago the first shift guys had left. Now I also understood why they say "Time flies". I knew we didnot have time to buy the gasket. We barely had time to get ready rush to some hotel, grab lunch and rush back to our bus stop....
When I reached office, the first thing I did was to call at Shri's extension. I felt very miserable. I wanted to inform him immediately because his shift time would end in some time and instead of taking the regular bus, he could take the one that goes to the "city" so that he can buy the gasket and then get back home on time to cook dinner...
Shri answered the phone with a warm "Hi" and I informed him that could not buy the gasket and so he would have to go to the city and get it. His warm tone changed to disappointment - "WHY?" he asked.
"I could not buy it, because I GOT UP LATE". Then an angry voice thundered - "I asked you to buy a gasket, so why did you GET UP LATE?". (I was irritated... What the hell... I woke up late and could not buy it and why doesn't he understand?)
"Shri I told you... I GOT UP LATE and so I could not buy it". Shri was even furious
"But why did you GET UP LATE?" (I didnt feel like answering that question... none of his business I thought but answered him)
"I told you clearly... I could not get a gasket because I GOT UP LATE".
"Why did you GET UP LATE? Instead of GETTING UP LATE, you could have got the gasket" (Why is he behaving so childish. Yes it is my mistake I admit, but I am informing him so that he can buy it before he reaches home. I was getting irritated now)
"Arrrey.... I just GOT UP LATE, so I could not get a gasket and thats why I am informing you".
"Anyway you GOT UP LATE, so you could have got a gasket instead"...
"Yaar, how can I get a gasket, when I GET UP LATE?".
"Why not??? anyway you went all the way, so you could have got the gasket". (Went all the way?? where to? I could not go anywhere, thats what I have been telling this guy - I GOT UP LATE).
He continued ... "You GOT UP LATE and you say you didn't go anywhere".
"Yes, thats the whole point. I GOT UP LATE and I didn't go anywhere"
"But why did you GET UP LATE when I had asked you to get a gasket and why do we need a PLATE now?"
(PLATE??? what plate is he talking about? I was confused and angry. Now, when did I tell him we need a plate? Neither did I mentioned PLATE and nor did I buy one).
"I didnt even have time to buy a gasket which was the most essential thing. why would I buy a plate?"
Shri was irritated now... "All the while you have been saying you GOT A PLATE and now you say you haven't"...
I could not control my laughter. It was Shri's turn to be angry and confused... He did not find anything funny there. I was still laughing over the phone because I realised why both of us were getting irritated with each other. Blame it on the language... All the while I have been saying - "I got up late" and he thought I said "I got a plate". While I kept saying "I could not buy the gasket because I GOT UP LATE" and he heard / understood it as "I could not buy the gasket because I GOT A PLATE".
Even today, when I see a gasket I cannot hold back the smile that appears on my face...
Read the other funny incident with my communication.
... way back in the early 90s while I was a bachelor when I worked with L&T at Mysore. We were 5 guys living in a small 2 BHK. We had shifts at office and so we had a tiny "notice board" in our living room, which will normally have messages for the people in the other shift. The guys in the second shift reach home close to midnight and by that time the first shift guys would hit the bed as they have to catch the company bus at around 7.20am. Similarly, when they leave for work, the second shift guys would still be fast asleep. In those days, we did not have the luxury of cell phone, pagers or even a land line. (Today life comes to a stand still without a cell phone. Even a student cant imagine a life without cell phone. It is an era where, Students may forget to carry their books to school/college but not their cell phone). We had a overlap of close to 45 minutes between people in the 2 shifts. So we normally communicate during that time if some information needs to be passed to each other. But if it is something urgent then the "notice board" comes to picture. Our so-called notice board was a thick rectangular piece of a sponge like packing material stuck to the wall on which we used to pin up the "communication" apart from letters from our families. ("Letters"... now they are called "Snail mails" - now, can a youngster imagine writing letters to their family?... I doubt if they have ever seen an inland letter).
Though we were bachelors, we used to cook our own food for various reasons...
1. It is any time healthier. 2. It worked out cheaper 3. We did not have the luxury of eating out everyday as we lived on a shoe string budget... and most importantly 4. We were great cooks in our own rights :P
One night myself and one of my roomates (Surendra a.k.a Suri Sr... Suri Sr. because I was also called Suri... so we became Suri Sr. and Suri Jr.) returned home from a night shift to see a "notice" waiting for us. The note was was written by Shri (Shrinath) and it read - "Our gasket is broken, buy a new one tomorrow morning". The guys in second shift normally get up very late around noon, cook food, have our "brunch" and then leave for office. Now this was an "emergency" notice because, if we follow the regular routine we will not be able to use the cooker as the gasket is broken. And for us to get a gasket we had to go to the "city" as they would not be available in the nearby "provison stores". Suri and myself looked at eachother and smiled... the smile meant -"So we have a job to do for tomorrow". (I must admit.. for some reason Suri Sr and myself understood each other very well to an extent that we could read the others mind perfectly... we could communicate without speaking a word). Suri hit the bed, while I followed my regular routine... switched on the TV (a black and white portable) which had our innovative "stolen" cable connection... stolen because we did not have a regular cable connection. We had a wire connected to internal antenna of the TV and the other end connected to a aluminium hanger that formed a "loop antenna" and the hanger would be placed out side through window. I try to tune in anything good that is watchable mostly some Sports channel or Discovery. I would watch TV until the screen starts to appear "blurred". I guess I switch off the TV involuntarily because, when I wake up in the morning (read afternoon) it is switched off and no one has ever complained that I go off to sleep without switching off the TV.
I could faintly hear "noises" around me... someone boiling the milk, Shri shouting - "Chandru keep water for me" (we used immersion coil to heat the water and with one bathroom it was always hectic in the morning ... each one trying to grab the "bathroom space"). I was only hearing these faintly and I knew it was close to 7.00am. Then I heard Singa's voice (Singarajan) - "Bye, bye, bye bye"... Singa was a very meticulous guy and worked on a time table. His time never interuppted anybody else's routine as he was always up early and by the time anyone of us are up, he would have finished even dressing up. Before he leaves home he makes it a point to say "bye" to each one of us without even waiting for a response.. though he would meet some of us at the bus stop in the next 5 mins or so. After sometime I hear the door slamming and then few hurried noisy foot steps on the stair case. I knew the guys were late.. we are late almost every day. I guess only SInga used to walk to the bus stop while the rest if us never had the luxury to do that and always had to jog. Finally, all the noises around me subsided and I had a peaceful sleep once again.... I guess it shd be around 7.15am.
Within "minutes" another noise distrubed my sleep. This time it was a noise from the kitchen. I thought a cat had entered our kitchen to drink the milk. I ran to the kitchen to see Surendra standing there trying to heat the milk. I was wondering why is this guy up so soon. As I entered the kitchen he smiled and it reminded me -"we have a job to do... the gasket". Now I knew why Suri was up "so early". I smiled back and asked - "So can we leave in sometime" and he said "yes we should, as we are late already". I said we have a lot of time and he smiled. This time around I could not make out the meaning of the smile, but I knew he had a message in it. I washed my face and started brushing when he said - "Hurry up, we need to have lunch before we reach the bus stop". I wondered what was wrong with him. I finished with my brushing and glanced at Singa's "time piece" (alarm clock) and now understood the meaning of Suri's smile moments ago. It was close to 1.00PM. I was shocked because... just "minutes" ago the first shift guys had left. Now I also understood why they say "Time flies". I knew we didnot have time to buy the gasket. We barely had time to get ready rush to some hotel, grab lunch and rush back to our bus stop....
When I reached office, the first thing I did was to call at Shri's extension. I felt very miserable. I wanted to inform him immediately because his shift time would end in some time and instead of taking the regular bus, he could take the one that goes to the "city" so that he can buy the gasket and then get back home on time to cook dinner...
Shri answered the phone with a warm "Hi" and I informed him that could not buy the gasket and so he would have to go to the city and get it. His warm tone changed to disappointment - "WHY?" he asked.
"I could not buy it, because I GOT UP LATE". Then an angry voice thundered - "I asked you to buy a gasket, so why did you GET UP LATE?". (I was irritated... What the hell... I woke up late and could not buy it and why doesn't he understand?)
"Shri I told you... I GOT UP LATE and so I could not buy it". Shri was even furious
"But why did you GET UP LATE?" (I didnt feel like answering that question... none of his business I thought but answered him)
"I told you clearly... I could not get a gasket because I GOT UP LATE".
"Why did you GET UP LATE? Instead of GETTING UP LATE, you could have got the gasket" (Why is he behaving so childish. Yes it is my mistake I admit, but I am informing him so that he can buy it before he reaches home. I was getting irritated now)
"Arrrey.... I just GOT UP LATE, so I could not get a gasket and thats why I am informing you".
"Anyway you GOT UP LATE, so you could have got a gasket instead"...
"Yaar, how can I get a gasket, when I GET UP LATE?".
"Why not??? anyway you went all the way, so you could have got the gasket". (Went all the way?? where to? I could not go anywhere, thats what I have been telling this guy - I GOT UP LATE).
He continued ... "You GOT UP LATE and you say you didn't go anywhere".
"Yes, thats the whole point. I GOT UP LATE and I didn't go anywhere"
"But why did you GET UP LATE when I had asked you to get a gasket and why do we need a PLATE now?"
(PLATE??? what plate is he talking about? I was confused and angry. Now, when did I tell him we need a plate? Neither did I mentioned PLATE and nor did I buy one).
"I didnt even have time to buy a gasket which was the most essential thing. why would I buy a plate?"
Shri was irritated now... "All the while you have been saying you GOT A PLATE and now you say you haven't"...
I could not control my laughter. It was Shri's turn to be angry and confused... He did not find anything funny there. I was still laughing over the phone because I realised why both of us were getting irritated with each other. Blame it on the language... All the while I have been saying - "I got up late" and he thought I said "I got a plate". While I kept saying "I could not buy the gasket because I GOT UP LATE" and he heard / understood it as "I could not buy the gasket because I GOT A PLATE".
Even today, when I see a gasket I cannot hold back the smile that appears on my face...
Read the other funny incident with my communication.
